Keepin' it Real

           This post is completely un-house related, but it's something that has been on my heart for a number of months that I feel I need to share, and I can hold my tongue fingers no longer! It's an issue that's errrm....girl related...WAIT WAIT WAIT! Before you frantically start clicking at that "X" symbol in the top right hand corner of your screen you need to know that it's not like THAT! This is NOT "A Girl's Journey Into Womanhood: When Hormones and Periods Attack" kind of post! (That being said, I will not be offended if any all male readers just hit the "X" button upon reading "periods" either...) ;) For any male still reading, you may continue if you'd like, but know that this post is meant for us girls. (However, you have my word you will not encounter any mentally scarring information or imagery during the remainder of this post. In fact, you might actually gain some insight into the way we think, and better understand why we act the crazy way that we do sometimes) Anyways, ladies, here it is:

            About a year and a bit ago, I was at a point in my life where I was letting Satan's lies get to me. Maybe he's whispered them in your ear too at one point or another? "You're not good enough" "You're not smart enough" You're not pretty enough" "No one likes you" "What a poor excuse for a Christian you are, what have you done for Him lately?" "Why do you even bother?" "You can't do it" and on and on he goes, smiling as you fall deeper into his trap. He's no dummy. He knows our weaknesses, and he knows just when to push the right buttons. It's most often when we think we're safe, and we lose sight of the One who made us, and died for us. That's how it happened for me anyway. It started out as one missed devotional, that turned into a few missed devotionals, to "not having time" for devotionals. And suddenly, my most important relationship had taken a back seat to work, and renovations, and other friends, and, in all honesty...ME.  It's funny sad how I can fall prey to believing I don't need a close relationship with God when my life is doing great "on its own". That's when the lies really started to HIT HARD. Thankfully for me, I didn't STAY there, trapped by the lies. I did something about it.

           I ended up going to a local Christian bookstore to pick up a new devotional, something just for me, and I was led to this book, "Princess Unaware" by Brenda Garrison.  It's directed at women, and it speaks to our struggles and it completely opened my eyes to the power of Satan's lies over me, and how I can overcome them with God's help. This being said, over the last few months I've witnessed these struggles creeping into some friends at times, and causing problems, and I was reminded of this book by Brenda Garrison. So I want to share some of this book with any lady reading, and hopefully, you'll find it helpful when Satan tries attacking you. Because let's face it, we all know he'll keep trying, and he know's exactly the right buttons to push.   From the book:

"The Comparison Mud Hole

Ooh, we women get sucked into this quicksand, and we barely put up a struggle to get out. We compare every area of our lives to the lives of other women:

Our appearance. Who has the best color on her hair? Who has the most desired body type- not too short, not too chubby, not too short waisted, not too flat, not too chesty? Who has the most stylish clothes? We are never pretty enough, stylish enough, or in good enough physical shape.

Our friendships. Who is better friends with whom? Who calls whom more often? Why doesn't she ever call me? She is closer to her than to me. Ugh. 


Our kids. Oh yeah, this is a gem. Either our kids are superior or they never quite measure up to someone else's. Why did her child make the team (or get a part in the play) and mine didn't?

Our husbands. Why can't my husband be as spiritual as the pastor? Why doesn't he bring me flowers for no particular reason? Why doesn't he feel my emotions and understand me deeply? Why isn't he the life of the party? (We want our husbands to be a combination of Billy Graham, Dr.Phil, Jerry Seinfeld, Brad Pitt, and our best girlfriend-and to know exactly when we want them to play each role!)

 Are you feeling silly? Do you see the pointlessness of comparing our lives to others'? The comparison game leads to self-absorbed introspection-thinking too often about ourselves. The trendy cliché 'It's all about me!' manifests when we waste time comparing ourselves to others.
 My friend Theresa says, 'Comparison is death to friendships.' The minute we start comparing, we build a barrier between us and the other person. Being a prisoner of this trap often tempts us to make a grocery list of our friend's perceived shortcomings and faults, or a list of every area in which we feel she surpasses us (and in our minds, looks down on us). As the list grows, so does our pity party-and with it, our dislike of our friend. Do you see how easily Satan uses these lists to put up barriers of inferiority, distrust, pride, and lies? We don't see the real person any longer-only our distorted perception of her. Not only do we distance ourselves from a good friend, we also fall for Satan's plan to isolate us from our sister in Christ."


      When I first read those words I thought..."Wow! That's SO true.......and SO stupid!" Why do we do this? Well the answer I found out, is very simple...and very complex...it's one of our biggest struggles (if not THE biggest), and it's a little thing called...wait for it...insecurity.  Have you ever experienced it? I know I have, and still do to be quite honest. But there are a few things I know to be true, and I constantly need to remind myself of them when my insecurity creeps in.

1) I was created unique be God (Psalm 139:13-14 "For You created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.")

2) God died for me, to make me perfect in His sight if I accept Him. (Romans 5:8 "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."  John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.")

3) God has a plan specifically for my life. (Jeremiah 29:11 "'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you; plans to give you hope and a future'")

Who am I to argue with God? Who am I to compare myself (created uniquely by God), or my life (the one God has planned specifically for me), to anyone else?!? And who am I to worry about what anyone else thinks of me besides Christ? Let's celebrate each other in our accomplishments, and uphold each other in our struggles. Let's keep our friendships REAL! Praise the Lord He made us each unique and gave us each a role to play out in His big plan! And praise the Lord He's with us each step of the way!!